doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
