seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
