he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
try to milk me bitch
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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