do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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