Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
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