Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Randomize
