The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
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