Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize
