i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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