Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize