You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
A+ Viking dick
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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