I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
