dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
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