No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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