She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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