whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize