dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
