He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
Randomize
