They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Randomize
