bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Randomize
