I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
Randomize
