i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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