If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
