A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
