Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
