Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
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