I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
God, I missed his penis.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
Randomize
