I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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