I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Randomize