i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Randomize
