Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Randomize
