we have officially lost it.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Well I just put wine in my tea
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
