Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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