ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
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