so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
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