Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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