why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Can I color on your dick again?
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
I deserve this hangover.
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