I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
