I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Randomize