Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
