Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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