He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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