Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Randomize
