I smell stomach acid.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
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