I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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