I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Randomize
