I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
