Having a random hookup so left but love u
just come out here and I will go home with you...
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize
