Umm I'm too high to move.
Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
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