you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize