i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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